This is probably one of the most retarded points of my life where my thoughts are just in shambles because my mind is rebelling against the idea of doing the OP slides.
Maybe it's because I feel that this is gonna be last minute again, and as much as I hate last minute work, I hate doing this to myself because I want to sleep so badly.
I recently found out how much I can be stretched and where is my breaking point. I don't think I can take another stretching from what I've experienced from WR. I don't want to clench my fists and cry again and again cause I feel so helpless in being unable to complete something on time and for it not to be perfect. And to calm myself down and get to work and to cry again halfway through because I feel so helpless.
I hate my faithlessness.
And I miss talking to Jon Tan, lollll.
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